Actually I am sitting at the moment but in the form of an update there is still no baby yet. I was hopeful last evening as I was feeling out of sorts and decided to add the last minutes things I thought I might need for the hospital to my bags & took a long shower. I could hardly stand, sit, or walk but not because of the usual back pain/feet aching/contractions but a new - er ah - issue that "developed" (has been developing since giving birth last time?) some time during the day yesterday that likely made me feel so uncomfortable. I will not go into detail here but the issue is fairly awful, very uncomfortable and the worst I have ever had when it comes to this particular issue. The things they never tell you about pregnancy, sheesh (or they do tell you but you choose to ignore because holy cow that will never happen to me... bahahhahahaa)
Now I am at work for half the day and I am staring at the flower my co-worker half jokingly brought over to me the other day - you know the old flower opening metaphor?? Yeah so there is that.
M is freaking out. We have not told him all the details, some, but not all. I think he can just sense it. He had a 2nd major tantrum (for lack of a better word) in less then three days this morning when we dropped him off at K's house. I feel horrible for him and I wish I could help him through his feelings but he is a little bit like me and needs to work through it on his own even if that means bouncing his head off the wall a million times before it all clicks.
K and I were talking after the drop off this morning and we are hoping against hope that once he sees that Pancake just lies there and does not move that this will quell some of his nerves. We never imagined that M would struggle this much with the new baby mostly because he has been okay with it with little hiccups here and there about the topic. We both agreed we just need to be as patient and calm as we can be, keep talking to him and give him what he needs which oddly enough is mostly to be left alone.
I did not think this would happen so soon but M likes to be left alone. He will go into his room and shut the door or sit quietly on the couch with his blanket and thumb staring out into space when something is bothering him. I guess I figured you know around 12 or 13 this would happen but not at age three. SO I am adjusting my thoughts about this behavior. It is hard because I want to go and comfort him and make sure he is okay but I need to remember he is a little human being who just needs his space and that every kid is different. That is just how my son deals with things. But man is it hard!
I am sure I will keep everyone up to date as to how things progress. For now I need to work and try to "wrap" things up (which is laughable in my job but whatever!) Hopefully yours, ME :)
Showing posts with label second pregnancy. Show all posts
Showing posts with label second pregnancy. Show all posts
Thursday, July 31, 2008
Tuesday, July 29, 2008
Sweep Sweep Sweep
What is that? Do you hear that?? It is silence. Or least the silence of no baby crying (yet), no diapers to change (yet) and no OMG I am SO excited to tell my birth story (yet)... SIGH. I am STILL STILL STILL very pregnant BUT we had positive news today at the appointment. 2-3 CM, VERY soft, her head is engaged, and I am 75% effaced. I am so FLIPPIN' excited I could do a little dance. The midwife swept my membranes so we shall see how that goes. I am taking the rest of the day off so I can go for a long old hot, rainy walk and maybe get some minor last minute things done. VERY EXCITING PEOPLE!!! Weeee...
I know this could mean nothing but it is better then last week. I told Kevin he HAD to hold my hand (which he did and did not flinch at all!) after last week's check. I had tears when she checked last week because the exam was SO painful. This week it was barely anything and the sweeping of the membranes - well someone told me it was quite painful but for me it was not, I felt a little ouch-y (for lack of better term) but nothing like last week SO yeah yeah yeah!
So that's out of the way. I thought I would share with everyone what my most awesome boss got for our little family. I am so excited I can hardly stand it! We were over at a friend's house and I was looking at all of the professional photos that were done. I thought to myself "self, the last time you took M to get photos done was when he was 18 months old and you did not even ORDER any because you were too cheap and you were in them and you felt like you looked like crap, WOE IS YOU."
Then I went home and looked at the photos we had out - sadly VERY VERY few and the ones that are out are horribly outdated. M is THREE now and most of the photos in frames at from when he was UNDER the age of two. Now we have taken several hundred photos between two and three but I just have not printed any that stood out and framed them. Also, HOW LAZY AM I??!!
SO I emailed a lady who was recommended to me and she responded immediately but I have been on this whole non communication jag suddenly (seems to be the thing to do for me at the end of a pregnancy...) and I have yet to write the poor photography woman back.
In the mean time I mentioned to my boss how we have not done any professional photos of M since he was 18 months old AND the new baby was coming and now I had to think about photos for two... OH GAWD WOE IS REALLY ME. Two days later she gathered K and I up and said 'I have a surprise for you.' AND she did.
She bought us a package photo deal with her brother in law who is an exceptional photographer. In fact I have wanted to have him do photos of M for three years but her brother in law is not only very good but VERY expensive. She bought his package called Baby's First Year! We will be able to get photos done at 3, 6, 9, & 12 months plus two additional photo sessions which we can do anything we want (family portrait, baby's first weeks, Mommy/baby session, etc...) After the first year, the brother in law puts together a framed photo of all four pictures so you can see how much changes during that year!!! I about died with excitement!
I may still go to the other woman for a set of three-ish pictures for Matthew and just use this gift for Pancake. Just another thing to look forward to once Miss Pancake makes her appearance (any day now little girl!!)
I know this could mean nothing but it is better then last week. I told Kevin he HAD to hold my hand (which he did and did not flinch at all!) after last week's check. I had tears when she checked last week because the exam was SO painful. This week it was barely anything and the sweeping of the membranes - well someone told me it was quite painful but for me it was not, I felt a little ouch-y (for lack of better term) but nothing like last week SO yeah yeah yeah!
So that's out of the way. I thought I would share with everyone what my most awesome boss got for our little family. I am so excited I can hardly stand it! We were over at a friend's house and I was looking at all of the professional photos that were done. I thought to myself "self, the last time you took M to get photos done was when he was 18 months old and you did not even ORDER any because you were too cheap and you were in them and you felt like you looked like crap, WOE IS YOU."
Then I went home and looked at the photos we had out - sadly VERY VERY few and the ones that are out are horribly outdated. M is THREE now and most of the photos in frames at from when he was UNDER the age of two. Now we have taken several hundred photos between two and three but I just have not printed any that stood out and framed them. Also, HOW LAZY AM I??!!
SO I emailed a lady who was recommended to me and she responded immediately but I have been on this whole non communication jag suddenly (seems to be the thing to do for me at the end of a pregnancy...) and I have yet to write the poor photography woman back.
In the mean time I mentioned to my boss how we have not done any professional photos of M since he was 18 months old AND the new baby was coming and now I had to think about photos for two... OH GAWD WOE IS REALLY ME. Two days later she gathered K and I up and said 'I have a surprise for you.' AND she did.
She bought us a package photo deal with her brother in law who is an exceptional photographer. In fact I have wanted to have him do photos of M for three years but her brother in law is not only very good but VERY expensive. She bought his package called Baby's First Year! We will be able to get photos done at 3, 6, 9, & 12 months plus two additional photo sessions which we can do anything we want (family portrait, baby's first weeks, Mommy/baby session, etc...) After the first year, the brother in law puts together a framed photo of all four pictures so you can see how much changes during that year!!! I about died with excitement!
I may still go to the other woman for a set of three-ish pictures for Matthew and just use this gift for Pancake. Just another thing to look forward to once Miss Pancake makes her appearance (any day now little girl!!)
Monday, July 28, 2008
Still waiting...
Ugha. That is the word I would describe how I feel right now. K and I went to bed last night, around midnight. We were both wired - K had a cup of coffee to late I just cannot sleep. We were also sucked into watching TMZ... BAD BAD TV.
Then M woke up at I do not even know what time. It was right before the "storm" started. He said there was a bat in his room. Then he proceeded to ask about his "bumpy" string every five minutes until I finally told him to please just go to sleep. This bumpy string is a little string that is bumpy that hangs from his tattered blankie and he feels he must hold on to it while sucking his thumb. Apparently it is very important to have when falling back to sleep after a bad dream in the middle of the night.
He/we fell back to sleep and I awoke to a kick to the face and the baby tummy. OUCH. He was talking very urgently about 'NO I was playing with that. GIVE IT BACK TO ME.' I rubbed his back gently to quiet him and he was quiet for 5 more minutes. He started back at '...that is MY grape. Give me it back. Take it out of your mouth...' Uhhh, yeah.
At this point I have been up for at least an hour but I am fairly certain it was longer then that. I was tired, uncomfortable, HOT and thankfully K came into to save me. We both went back to sleep in our bed but maybe 10 minutes later M started yelling for K and K slept in there the rest of the night. Needless to say sleeping in would have been a dandy option for both of us this morning.
BUT I am at work. Feeling a little hopeless right now. I am just ready. Ready to have a new sweet smelling little baby to keep me up at night, ready to wear "real" clothing, and start losing weight, ready to be able to bend over and not have my back ache in that staggeringly painful sharp way it does, ready to walk without a limp and have my pelvis feel like it is fused together once again.
I had a long-ish period of contractions Saturday evening and I have one or two from time to time but nothing consistent. I have tried being on the floor on my hands and knees to be sure Princess pancake is getting into the right position at least every day. I am beyond walking - it is hot and I swell just sitting now - the swelling started up on Friday. I am hot in the icy cool of air conditioning blowing on me. And I am mildly afraid to be too far away from a bathroom because I need to go 24/7 (and not #1...)
SO here we are week 40!!! and one day (but who is counting!!!) We shall see if I will go through with the scheduled induction. First things first, I need to get some sleep. Just a little bit. I am really ready to be done with work I have to say. It is hard to concentrate and harder to sit still all day long because my thoughts keep getting interrupted by this little baby living inside of me.
I am still grateful and excited. Do not get my wrong on this front. My complaints are more the garden variety end of pregnancy ones. I do not feel unique not do I really want sympathy. I just want to write about it because it is what it is. I have tried to write deep or thoughtful posts here and there. AND all of my photos are at home so I cannot just post some pictures that I have been meaning to post from 4th of July or of my 39th week of pregnancy. Mostly I am just writing to say I am waiting as patiently as I can. Hoping and waiting!
Our weekend was very nice. We did everything I said we would do from list on Friday and then it was over and here I am! How was your weekend!?
Then M woke up at I do not even know what time. It was right before the "storm" started. He said there was a bat in his room. Then he proceeded to ask about his "bumpy" string every five minutes until I finally told him to please just go to sleep. This bumpy string is a little string that is bumpy that hangs from his tattered blankie and he feels he must hold on to it while sucking his thumb. Apparently it is very important to have when falling back to sleep after a bad dream in the middle of the night.
He/we fell back to sleep and I awoke to a kick to the face and the baby tummy. OUCH. He was talking very urgently about 'NO I was playing with that. GIVE IT BACK TO ME.' I rubbed his back gently to quiet him and he was quiet for 5 more minutes. He started back at '...that is MY grape. Give me it back. Take it out of your mouth...' Uhhh, yeah.
At this point I have been up for at least an hour but I am fairly certain it was longer then that. I was tired, uncomfortable, HOT and thankfully K came into to save me. We both went back to sleep in our bed but maybe 10 minutes later M started yelling for K and K slept in there the rest of the night. Needless to say sleeping in would have been a dandy option for both of us this morning.
BUT I am at work. Feeling a little hopeless right now. I am just ready. Ready to have a new sweet smelling little baby to keep me up at night, ready to wear "real" clothing, and start losing weight, ready to be able to bend over and not have my back ache in that staggeringly painful sharp way it does, ready to walk without a limp and have my pelvis feel like it is fused together once again.
I had a long-ish period of contractions Saturday evening and I have one or two from time to time but nothing consistent. I have tried being on the floor on my hands and knees to be sure Princess pancake is getting into the right position at least every day. I am beyond walking - it is hot and I swell just sitting now - the swelling started up on Friday. I am hot in the icy cool of air conditioning blowing on me. And I am mildly afraid to be too far away from a bathroom because I need to go 24/7 (and not #1...)
SO here we are week 40!!! and one day (but who is counting!!!) We shall see if I will go through with the scheduled induction. First things first, I need to get some sleep. Just a little bit. I am really ready to be done with work I have to say. It is hard to concentrate and harder to sit still all day long because my thoughts keep getting interrupted by this little baby living inside of me.
I am still grateful and excited. Do not get my wrong on this front. My complaints are more the garden variety end of pregnancy ones. I do not feel unique not do I really want sympathy. I just want to write about it because it is what it is. I have tried to write deep or thoughtful posts here and there. AND all of my photos are at home so I cannot just post some pictures that I have been meaning to post from 4th of July or of my 39th week of pregnancy. Mostly I am just writing to say I am waiting as patiently as I can. Hoping and waiting!
Our weekend was very nice. We did everything I said we would do from list on Friday and then it was over and here I am! How was your weekend!?
Wednesday, July 23, 2008
Mini-Update
Update: STILL PREGNANT (DAY 277) (I feel like I am writing my blog from some weird deserted island for pregnant ladies!)
Stats: 1 to 1-1/2 (close to 2 - see below) cm dilated, 50 (ISH)% effaced (you have to love those technical terms - 50%ish I swear that is what the Midwife said) and soft...
Exam: Ummm OUCH, *(&(%$)(#%)(#%() OUCHHHHHHHH
****
It is cooler outside so for that I am grateful. Things that we did and I am looking forward to: we went to the County Fair last evening and a gathering of friends to visit with on Friday evening complete with BROWNIES (no ice cream - I am now in full denial mode... Pancake, NO MORE ICE CREAM.) YES, I had some the night before last even though I said no more. It was Cookies and Cream and I love Cookies and Cream. Plus it makes me feel better... Tsk tsk tsk, I know!
I am making a pedicure appointment for Saturday because I really want one and dammit if I am going to full term I will have cute toes when I get there.
Hey and it is pay day Friday... Oh wait I am NOT going to be paid because I stopped taking my draw. Wow, that totally rocks.
Hmm, well The X Files movie begins Friday - not that I will be seeing it on opening night but hey how long do movies take to get to DVD these days, like 30 days after release, right!? I am freakin' excited for the X Files movies to start. I do not want to hear about it if you see. I want to be surprised and impressed and fall in love with Scully and Mulder ALL over again! Now that is something to look forward to!
Next update on pregnancy stats: Wednesday July 30th at 9:45a (membranes will be stripped, baby better come or else... like threatening her works!)
Stats: 1 to 1-1/2 (close to 2 - see below) cm dilated, 50 (ISH)% effaced (you have to love those technical terms - 50%ish I swear that is what the Midwife said) and soft...
Exam: Ummm OUCH, *(&(%$)(#%)(#%() OUCHHHHHHHH
****
It is cooler outside so for that I am grateful. Things that we did and I am looking forward to: we went to the County Fair last evening and a gathering of friends to visit with on Friday evening complete with BROWNIES (no ice cream - I am now in full denial mode... Pancake, NO MORE ICE CREAM.) YES, I had some the night before last even though I said no more. It was Cookies and Cream and I love Cookies and Cream. Plus it makes me feel better... Tsk tsk tsk, I know!
I am making a pedicure appointment for Saturday because I really want one and dammit if I am going to full term I will have cute toes when I get there.
Hey and it is pay day Friday... Oh wait I am NOT going to be paid because I stopped taking my draw. Wow, that totally rocks.
Hmm, well The X Files movie begins Friday - not that I will be seeing it on opening night but hey how long do movies take to get to DVD these days, like 30 days after release, right!? I am freakin' excited for the X Files movies to start. I do not want to hear about it if you see. I want to be surprised and impressed and fall in love with Scully and Mulder ALL over again! Now that is something to look forward to!
Next update on pregnancy stats: Wednesday July 30th at 9:45a (membranes will be stripped, baby better come or else... like threatening her works!)
Monday, July 21, 2008
Pain IN the A$$?
It is like hot HOT right now. Like 91 yesterday. (Like what on God's green earth was I thinking about when we decided to try for a summer baby!??!?!) Sunday morning, I actually thought it was cooler in the morning then it had been on Saturday and managed to sit outside until I could no longer bend my fingers or toes (healthy, right?! Should have my BP taken when I do stupid stuff like that - 108 over 72 my ass...) M was playing in his pool and I love to hang out with him when he is doing this. It is HARD to stay inside when all of the "fun" stuff is happening outside.
Any who, in the afternoon, we attended a funeral for our co-worker's husband. Something I forgot about despite having it on two calendars but I was tired and K failed to remind me (DAMMIT THAT IS HIS JOB, RIGHT?!) So K went to the funeral on time and I rushed to get ready and drag M out of his bed to get there about 20 minutes later. GOOD THING. The church had air conditioning from like the 1950s and we were on the upper level. Not to mention M's attention span lasted all of 10 minutes before he started asking where his Daddy was VERY LOUDLY. Likely it was good for both M and I that we were late because the service ended about 30 minutes after we arrived and I truly cannot image having to sit for the entire 50 minute service.
After the funeral, we had the brilliant idea to hit the local County Fair that started this weekend. We got through all the animal barns. We hit the food stands where M and I shared a funnel cake. And really let's just stop there - what other reason is there to go to the fair then to see big huge smelly sleeping pigs and eat funnel cake!? Yummers (to the funnel cake, not the pigs)!!! We (I) did not last long due to the extreme heat. We went last year around the same time of day and the place was packed. This year most of the people who were there already were the 4-h kids and their families. It was just too HOT to be out. M's favorite part: the digger and bulldozer working in the grandstand area. And a horse whose name had something to do with fire and the outside of the stall was decorated with firemen items. He kept saying he loved the fire horse!
The storms arrived not long after we came home. Two big quick rain storms that produced a beautiful full bright rainbow which we went out to look at. M played in the puddles and I got to gardening. BAD BAD MOVE on my part. With this pregnancy I have experienced back pain. Well, more to the point my butt hurts. I bent over to clip some dead flowers and I was stuck. It was classic. I told K I cannot move. He just looked at me like "are you serious?" to which I just nodded YES indeed I am. The pain was out of this world. K came to drag me up the drive way (which is FLAT) and I stumbled into the house trying to figure what to do for the pain.
This was worst pain yet. And everything I did made it worse. As in trying to sit, stand, walk, GO TO THE BATHROOM... OMG. I grabbed an ice pack and shoved it down my shorts and tried to find a comfortable position. If I settled into a position I could not move or else the pain came back standing the hair on my arms on end. The ice pack helped to relieve some of the pain to the point where I could get a few things done then we headed off to bed.
K offered to massage that area. I kept saying my back hurt but when I showed K the area that hurt he started laughing at me and said "honey that is not your back that it is your butt!" Okay I knew this but who wants to say my butt hurts all the time... it just sounds umm weird, you know? Needless to say K was a good sport and his massage to my left bum region (TMI???) helped to get rid of the pain. Today my back hurts, for real this time. Like lower back pain NOT my butt I swear. (I have lost all creditability, huh?) (WHAT? Stop looking at me like that) (it is my lower back and NOT my butt, I swear)
ALSO, send birthing vibes my way, PLEASE! That little floaty baby thing down there says 39weeks and 1 day. I (WE) are so ready for Miss Peach to arrive, LIKE NOW. Thank you for your help (it is MY BACK that hurts now, I swear!)
Any who, in the afternoon, we attended a funeral for our co-worker's husband. Something I forgot about despite having it on two calendars but I was tired and K failed to remind me (DAMMIT THAT IS HIS JOB, RIGHT?!) So K went to the funeral on time and I rushed to get ready and drag M out of his bed to get there about 20 minutes later. GOOD THING. The church had air conditioning from like the 1950s and we were on the upper level. Not to mention M's attention span lasted all of 10 minutes before he started asking where his Daddy was VERY LOUDLY. Likely it was good for both M and I that we were late because the service ended about 30 minutes after we arrived and I truly cannot image having to sit for the entire 50 minute service.
After the funeral, we had the brilliant idea to hit the local County Fair that started this weekend. We got through all the animal barns. We hit the food stands where M and I shared a funnel cake. And really let's just stop there - what other reason is there to go to the fair then to see big huge smelly sleeping pigs and eat funnel cake!? Yummers (to the funnel cake, not the pigs)!!! We (I) did not last long due to the extreme heat. We went last year around the same time of day and the place was packed. This year most of the people who were there already were the 4-h kids and their families. It was just too HOT to be out. M's favorite part: the digger and bulldozer working in the grandstand area. And a horse whose name had something to do with fire and the outside of the stall was decorated with firemen items. He kept saying he loved the fire horse!
The storms arrived not long after we came home. Two big quick rain storms that produced a beautiful full bright rainbow which we went out to look at. M played in the puddles and I got to gardening. BAD BAD MOVE on my part. With this pregnancy I have experienced back pain. Well, more to the point my butt hurts. I bent over to clip some dead flowers and I was stuck. It was classic. I told K I cannot move. He just looked at me like "are you serious?" to which I just nodded YES indeed I am. The pain was out of this world. K came to drag me up the drive way (which is FLAT) and I stumbled into the house trying to figure what to do for the pain.
This was worst pain yet. And everything I did made it worse. As in trying to sit, stand, walk, GO TO THE BATHROOM... OMG. I grabbed an ice pack and shoved it down my shorts and tried to find a comfortable position. If I settled into a position I could not move or else the pain came back standing the hair on my arms on end. The ice pack helped to relieve some of the pain to the point where I could get a few things done then we headed off to bed.
K offered to massage that area. I kept saying my back hurt but when I showed K the area that hurt he started laughing at me and said "honey that is not your back that it is your butt!" Okay I knew this but who wants to say my butt hurts all the time... it just sounds umm weird, you know? Needless to say K was a good sport and his massage to my left bum region (TMI???) helped to get rid of the pain. Today my back hurts, for real this time. Like lower back pain NOT my butt I swear. (I have lost all creditability, huh?) (WHAT? Stop looking at me like that) (it is my lower back and NOT my butt, I swear)
ALSO, send birthing vibes my way, PLEASE! That little floaty baby thing down there says 39weeks and 1 day. I (WE) are so ready for Miss Peach to arrive, LIKE NOW. Thank you for your help (it is MY BACK that hurts now, I swear!)
Tuesday, July 15, 2008
My Little Fashion Critic
Conversation I had with my three year old before I left for work yesterday morning.
M: Mommy I love those green shoes...
Me: Why thank you Matthew.
M: They match your shirt PERFECTLY.
ME: bahahahahaha (Kevin in the background also laughing and at the same time looking slightly perplexed.)
M seems to be feeling better. He slept through the night and has a tiny cough but otherwise he seems to be at the end of the cold. Me, not so much BUT I am keeping a positive attitude. I figure being sick with a minor cold is about the least of my worries at this point!
Mostly today I decided to turn my bad 'tude around and enjoy the last days of pregnancy because THEY ARE MY LAST DAYS OF PREGNANCY, dudettes!!! I am amazed by this. Week 38 or TWELVE days till touch down! I love it. I love that for most of the time since wee Pancake has dropped she keeps her heel (or what I assume is a heel and until the midwife tells me differently I will continue to assume HEEL) firmly planted in the front of my belly down low so you can feel and see the shape of it. I cannot wait to see and meet that heel which I rub all the time (and it makes her move - maybe she is ticklish like her big brother!!!)
I stopped having contractions for a couple of days and Pancake's movements have slowed a bit which kind of freaked me out last evening as I thought about it but then the contractions started back up not five minutes after I mentioned this to Kevin and I have been having some here and there since then.
Sick or not, I am SO ready to meet this wee little tot, to snuggle her face and check out those fingers and toes. To find out her hair color - will it be red like M's or something new? To dress her in some of that cute clothing we have been hording away for months now and have her home tightly wrapped like a little burrito, to lay her on the floor and let the dogs sniffle her face, getting to know her, like they did with Matthew, to see M's reaction to Pancake and see them grow and become siblings over the coming years. To find out how life will change and get used to four (six?!) instead of three in the house.
I realized last evening as I grunted and groaned to get off the couch that I am VERY excited to meet this baby far beyond any amount of complaining I can do here or anywhere for that matter. I feel like there is a light at the end of the tunnel even if it is a "late" light, I know it is there, finally and I am terribly excited about that!
Now if I could just regulate my body temperature, life would be groovy!!! I have the 38 week appointment with Liz tomorrow at 8:30a so look for possible updates tomorrow some time!!!
M: Mommy I love those green shoes...
Me: Why thank you Matthew.
M: They match your shirt PERFECTLY.
ME: bahahahahaha (Kevin in the background also laughing and at the same time looking slightly perplexed.)
M seems to be feeling better. He slept through the night and has a tiny cough but otherwise he seems to be at the end of the cold. Me, not so much BUT I am keeping a positive attitude. I figure being sick with a minor cold is about the least of my worries at this point!
Mostly today I decided to turn my bad 'tude around and enjoy the last days of pregnancy because THEY ARE MY LAST DAYS OF PREGNANCY, dudettes!!! I am amazed by this. Week 38 or TWELVE days till touch down! I love it. I love that for most of the time since wee Pancake has dropped she keeps her heel (or what I assume is a heel and until the midwife tells me differently I will continue to assume HEEL) firmly planted in the front of my belly down low so you can feel and see the shape of it. I cannot wait to see and meet that heel which I rub all the time (and it makes her move - maybe she is ticklish like her big brother!!!)
I stopped having contractions for a couple of days and Pancake's movements have slowed a bit which kind of freaked me out last evening as I thought about it but then the contractions started back up not five minutes after I mentioned this to Kevin and I have been having some here and there since then.
Sick or not, I am SO ready to meet this wee little tot, to snuggle her face and check out those fingers and toes. To find out her hair color - will it be red like M's or something new? To dress her in some of that cute clothing we have been hording away for months now and have her home tightly wrapped like a little burrito, to lay her on the floor and let the dogs sniffle her face, getting to know her, like they did with Matthew, to see M's reaction to Pancake and see them grow and become siblings over the coming years. To find out how life will change and get used to four (six?!) instead of three in the house.
I realized last evening as I grunted and groaned to get off the couch that I am VERY excited to meet this baby far beyond any amount of complaining I can do here or anywhere for that matter. I feel like there is a light at the end of the tunnel even if it is a "late" light, I know it is there, finally and I am terribly excited about that!
Now if I could just regulate my body temperature, life would be groovy!!! I have the 38 week appointment with Liz tomorrow at 8:30a so look for possible updates tomorrow some time!!!
Friday, June 20, 2008
Refresher Course
We had our refresher birth class last evening. There was just one other couple and our Douala, Molly, "taught" the class. It was actually a lot of fun and great to just to be reminded of some of things that maybe escaped us. I also bought the cutest skirt for $3 from their little store! We set up a time to meet with Molly in a couple of weeks. Then we went home, chatted with Kelly (thank you thank you thank you! we totally owe you!) and went to sleep.
Lo, the dreams I had last night were freakish and frightening. Perhaps it was all that reliving of the 1st labor and delivery process. Both myself and the other women had long crazy birth stories (and seriously hers ended with two weeks after giving birth having a forgotten SPONGE removed from her body...)
The main dream that did not seem to ever end but has made me immeasurably exhausted this morning was of me laboring for hours. On the floor, an industrial strength type hospital floor. Otherwise the room was devoid of anything besides me moaning and moving around. Of course hours went by and NO BABY. Molly and another unidentified person were there telling me this was JUST NOT WORKING. SO the opposite of what a Douala is supposed to do, right!? It was like my worst baby delivery nightmare. When I had Matthew I did not have him on the floor I can assure you of that. I actually tried numerous positions during labor but not a single one included lying on the hospital floor because UGHHHA, gross. I have dark shadows under my eyes that go down to me knees from two nights of hellish sleep patterns. Oh and did I mention my eyes popped open at 5:00a and would not stay closed.
Any who along with the charming hours long labor dream sequence & early morning wake up call by own damn body, I had not one, not two but THREE leg cramps in the same leg one right after another... on and on. This time I did not scream but I did writhe in pain, grip the sides of the mattress AND my leg and moaned quietly. Sort of like labor... Ah yeah. This was my right leg and if you will recall last evening I had a leg crap which was in my left leg that made me slightly limpy. Now I am can hardly walk on top of the already painful pelvic waddle I had before any leg cramps occurred. I must just be a sight to behold.
Pregnancy glow, my ass!
***
Also, what about this???
Lo, the dreams I had last night were freakish and frightening. Perhaps it was all that reliving of the 1st labor and delivery process. Both myself and the other women had long crazy birth stories (and seriously hers ended with two weeks after giving birth having a forgotten SPONGE removed from her body...)
The main dream that did not seem to ever end but has made me immeasurably exhausted this morning was of me laboring for hours. On the floor, an industrial strength type hospital floor. Otherwise the room was devoid of anything besides me moaning and moving around. Of course hours went by and NO BABY. Molly and another unidentified person were there telling me this was JUST NOT WORKING. SO the opposite of what a Douala is supposed to do, right!? It was like my worst baby delivery nightmare. When I had Matthew I did not have him on the floor I can assure you of that. I actually tried numerous positions during labor but not a single one included lying on the hospital floor because UGHHHA, gross. I have dark shadows under my eyes that go down to me knees from two nights of hellish sleep patterns. Oh and did I mention my eyes popped open at 5:00a and would not stay closed.
Any who along with the charming hours long labor dream sequence & early morning wake up call by own damn body, I had not one, not two but THREE leg cramps in the same leg one right after another... on and on. This time I did not scream but I did writhe in pain, grip the sides of the mattress AND my leg and moaned quietly. Sort of like labor... Ah yeah. This was my right leg and if you will recall last evening I had a leg crap which was in my left leg that made me slightly limpy. Now I am can hardly walk on top of the already painful pelvic waddle I had before any leg cramps occurred. I must just be a sight to behold.
Pregnancy glow, my ass!
***
Also, what about this???
Tuesday, May 20, 2008
Photo Mish Mash
I promised some photos so here they are in all their randomness.
M on his big boy bike!
Just because...
Frontal view - 30-ish weeks (and this shows what dorky faces I can truly make!)
Goofy Side view - 30-ish weeks
(Holy HUGE pregnant lady batman ;)
M on his big boy bike!
Just because...
Frontal view - 30-ish weeks (and this shows what dorky faces I can truly make!)
Goofy Side view - 30-ish weeks
(Holy HUGE pregnant lady batman ;)
30 WEEKS and counting!
THIRTY weeks. 30 weeks. WOW! How times flies!!! That is amazing to me. I have felt (I will regret writing this I am sure) pretty good the past few days. When I say that I have had some strong contractions especially yesterday. If I sat perfectly still the contractions would subside which is just dandy but that also meant I was planting my butt in my chair at work for nine hours straight without taking lunch, only to get up and take the well worn path from my desk to the kitchen for food which is a non stop feast in my case! This cannot be healthy.
Can it be that in 8-ISH short weeks I will be having a new baby to hold, love and cuddle?!?! AMAZING! I will post pregnancy photos of me from yesterday as well as shots of the Pancake's room tonight.
I have been trying to think and plan for what I will need for the hospital and after. I know I cannot think of everything but I would like to remember the things that were great to have that I did not know about the first time.
I was laughing heartily over the weekend at how wonderful Kevin was in those early days after Matthew arrived. He ran out and bought me Depends (birth is SO sexy...), monstrous pads and stool softener - that is TMI TOTALLY! Now that is LOVE. I have a list but I keep thinking of new things like those flat little cotton pads. Those are great for everything after a baby comes. Matthew had a rash early on and we would get those wet and use them as wipes rather then regular store bought wipes and the rash went away almost immediately! I definitely need more of those!
My office decided to throw us a shower which happens tomorrow then we will need to decide on what we really need beyond that. Three of the biggies are a bouncer, a couple of slings and a new baby monitor.
I have yet to commit to slings. I looked once and never did buy any. I need to unearth emails from Melissa about the ones she liked the most.
Additionally I am still grappling with whether I want to use cloth or disposable diapers. The same place I would like buy slings has the best selection of covers and diapers in town that I have ever seen which would make is easier to buy these things locally versus the first time when I would have had to buy most everything online. I am thinking we may try a combo thing.
Oh and ha we still need to do something about daycare for Pancake... Both Kevin and I keep putting it off which is just tragic.
Anything you can think of that I/we might need?
Can it be that in 8-ISH short weeks I will be having a new baby to hold, love and cuddle?!?! AMAZING! I will post pregnancy photos of me from yesterday as well as shots of the Pancake's room tonight.
I have been trying to think and plan for what I will need for the hospital and after. I know I cannot think of everything but I would like to remember the things that were great to have that I did not know about the first time.
I was laughing heartily over the weekend at how wonderful Kevin was in those early days after Matthew arrived. He ran out and bought me Depends (birth is SO sexy...), monstrous pads and stool softener - that is TMI TOTALLY! Now that is LOVE. I have a list but I keep thinking of new things like those flat little cotton pads. Those are great for everything after a baby comes. Matthew had a rash early on and we would get those wet and use them as wipes rather then regular store bought wipes and the rash went away almost immediately! I definitely need more of those!
My office decided to throw us a shower which happens tomorrow then we will need to decide on what we really need beyond that. Three of the biggies are a bouncer, a couple of slings and a new baby monitor.
I have yet to commit to slings. I looked once and never did buy any. I need to unearth emails from Melissa about the ones she liked the most.
Additionally I am still grappling with whether I want to use cloth or disposable diapers. The same place I would like buy slings has the best selection of covers and diapers in town that I have ever seen which would make is easier to buy these things locally versus the first time when I would have had to buy most everything online. I am thinking we may try a combo thing.
Oh and ha we still need to do something about daycare for Pancake... Both Kevin and I keep putting it off which is just tragic.
Anything you can think of that I/we might need?
Monday, April 28, 2008
Friday, April 25, 2008
Random Musings
DISCLAIMER ALERT: I do comment about LOST & Survivor in this post so if you did not watch it and plan to watch it at a later date you may not want to read this. There are only a few details and I do not think I give away too much but still...
TWENTY SIX WEEKS! OMG, okay I totally know it happened and when but wow. When Liz, the midwife, said the number of weeks on Wednesday morning I kind of took a deeper breath and swallowed a lump in my throat. The crazier part of this - last week and into the weekend I felt like h-e-double hockey sticks. I thought my pelvis was going to crack in two, I could hardly walk. If I stood and walked a lot the ligaments in my lower right abdomen (mostly) screamed at me to STOP. I was alternately swollen and hot even in the 50 degree weather on Saturday. I was exhausted and could hardly move around while lying in bed. However, suddenly, the past few days I have felt awesome. I jogged on the tread mill. Twice this week! For 20 minutes! Last week I tried and was almost sobbing after a minute. I know the pain & swelling is not gone for good but it feels great to have a reprieve from it for a few days!
Nothing exciting to report after the appointment. Miss Pancake (if you will ;) was rockin' the perfect heart beat while punching/kicking at the monitor the whole time. I asked about the due date and Liz said they did adjust it slightly from the ultrasound with that whole +/- a week thing. Given my past pregnancy I will probably be late and should think about inducing sooner then last time if I ended up being later then a week or so. We shall see... I get to do the glucose test in two weeks - YEAH! Trying to be positive here, people!
(no segue way here...)
Aren't you glad it is Friday? I sure am! It has been a lovely week in B-town. Sunshine and warm temps. A bit of rain but we are back at it this morning with more of the sun and warmer temps. Gotta love that.
By the way, have I mentioned recently that we still have no name for this child? Is she doomed to be call Baby Girl or Miss Pancake the rest of her life? I suppose there are worse names right? I have this feeling we will end up with a top five name again just because those are the names we like and we cannot seem to come to a decision on other names. I am sure it will be just a dandy name no matter what we decide or at least that I is what I keep telling myself! A report on NPR said that what you name your child can directly result in his/her success in life... NO pressure right?! Weeee...
Did I mention I had a dream that Arnold Schwarzenegger helped to birth not only my child but Kelly's baby too? And it was not like the Governator Arnold who helped but old school ARRR-nold who did it? Except he was not wearing camo and holding guns but he was wearing a suit and tie... He was just talking like Arnold from the movies... Hey at least I had a good chuckle in the morning. My dreams with Matthew were mostly dark brooding things that I would have been embarrassed to write about!? So Kelly, if you see a large Austrian man wandering around at any point during your pregnancy - WATCH OUT, your baby is on the way!!
Did you like the guest writer? He got a bee in his bonnet the other night and then he could not stop. He kept saying I should blog about this or that the WHOLE night.
I really suck at posting photos. I also meant to write a blog on Matthew's birthday and show past photos from his 1st & 2nd birthday. But I ran out of time and energy. Theme of my life at the moment. Well I had enough energy to eat dessert every night this week. OH speaking of that, I looked back and I actually lost a pound at this last appointment?! Weird! I think I was just really blotted last time and I had on huge heavy shoes because it was still cool outside so I think that is where the lose occurred. Not so much that my actual weight is decreasing.
SO did anyone else watch Lost last night? I was actually underwhelmed for once. I was like how on earth did Sawyer escape the bullets (by hiding behind a picnic table no less) when the dudes with guns managed to shoot three other people dead on? And the whole Morse code thing? Just not that thrilled by it. I hope it gets better. Even Survivor kind of bored me last night. What is with these people? Use the idols! What the heck?
Any who, before I bore you all to tears (even though I can think of 900 other stupid things to share) I will go. Have a sunny and (hopefully) warm weekend!
TWENTY SIX WEEKS! OMG, okay I totally know it happened and when but wow. When Liz, the midwife, said the number of weeks on Wednesday morning I kind of took a deeper breath and swallowed a lump in my throat. The crazier part of this - last week and into the weekend I felt like h-e-double hockey sticks. I thought my pelvis was going to crack in two, I could hardly walk. If I stood and walked a lot the ligaments in my lower right abdomen (mostly) screamed at me to STOP. I was alternately swollen and hot even in the 50 degree weather on Saturday. I was exhausted and could hardly move around while lying in bed. However, suddenly, the past few days I have felt awesome. I jogged on the tread mill. Twice this week! For 20 minutes! Last week I tried and was almost sobbing after a minute. I know the pain & swelling is not gone for good but it feels great to have a reprieve from it for a few days!
Nothing exciting to report after the appointment. Miss Pancake (if you will ;) was rockin' the perfect heart beat while punching/kicking at the monitor the whole time. I asked about the due date and Liz said they did adjust it slightly from the ultrasound with that whole +/- a week thing. Given my past pregnancy I will probably be late and should think about inducing sooner then last time if I ended up being later then a week or so. We shall see... I get to do the glucose test in two weeks - YEAH! Trying to be positive here, people!
(no segue way here...)
Aren't you glad it is Friday? I sure am! It has been a lovely week in B-town. Sunshine and warm temps. A bit of rain but we are back at it this morning with more of the sun and warmer temps. Gotta love that.
By the way, have I mentioned recently that we still have no name for this child? Is she doomed to be call Baby Girl or Miss Pancake the rest of her life? I suppose there are worse names right? I have this feeling we will end up with a top five name again just because those are the names we like and we cannot seem to come to a decision on other names. I am sure it will be just a dandy name no matter what we decide or at least that I is what I keep telling myself! A report on NPR said that what you name your child can directly result in his/her success in life... NO pressure right?! Weeee...
Did I mention I had a dream that Arnold Schwarzenegger helped to birth not only my child but Kelly's baby too? And it was not like the Governator Arnold who helped but old school ARRR-nold who did it? Except he was not wearing camo and holding guns but he was wearing a suit and tie... He was just talking like Arnold from the movies... Hey at least I had a good chuckle in the morning. My dreams with Matthew were mostly dark brooding things that I would have been embarrassed to write about!? So Kelly, if you see a large Austrian man wandering around at any point during your pregnancy - WATCH OUT, your baby is on the way!!
Did you like the guest writer? He got a bee in his bonnet the other night and then he could not stop. He kept saying I should blog about this or that the WHOLE night.
I really suck at posting photos. I also meant to write a blog on Matthew's birthday and show past photos from his 1st & 2nd birthday. But I ran out of time and energy. Theme of my life at the moment. Well I had enough energy to eat dessert every night this week. OH speaking of that, I looked back and I actually lost a pound at this last appointment?! Weird! I think I was just really blotted last time and I had on huge heavy shoes because it was still cool outside so I think that is where the lose occurred. Not so much that my actual weight is decreasing.
SO did anyone else watch Lost last night? I was actually underwhelmed for once. I was like how on earth did Sawyer escape the bullets (by hiding behind a picnic table no less) when the dudes with guns managed to shoot three other people dead on? And the whole Morse code thing? Just not that thrilled by it. I hope it gets better. Even Survivor kind of bored me last night. What is with these people? Use the idols! What the heck?
Any who, before I bore you all to tears (even though I can think of 900 other stupid things to share) I will go. Have a sunny and (hopefully) warm weekend!
Monday, March 17, 2008
Hot flashes, Indigestion and Bunnies
Nothing like four days of non stop indigestion, reflux and basic horrible stomach pain (all of this would occur in the afternoon and evening...) coupled with a complete lack of sleep along with weird-o dreams and a few pregnancy freak out moments, well I felt I like a newbie to this pregnancy thing. I never had the upset stomach indigestion thing (much) the first time so this is a new, shocking and painful experience. And indigestion - a few times here and there but NOTHING like this.... The sleep thing - well I am sure I had that the 1st go around but I also could lie around and do nothing when I was tired. Now you know there is this little toddler who has needs and wants AND I really want to be there for him and enjoy the time I have with him now. However, sitting near the toilet with a container of Tums in one hand & a glass of water in the other - that is not exactly ENJOYMENT.
OH and one more complaint then I will STOP, I swear. But lordy people the hot flashes and cold sweats... I told Kevin that if this is menopause I would prefer to skip that phase of life, please and thank you. Let's just say that both mornings this weekend I was in a short sleeved shirt OUTSIDE trying to cool off. Then once I cooled off I was HOT but freezing which is just a weird experience to have. SO yeah.
Other then the afternoon/evening illness - heat waves it was a great weekend. No seriously. I mean we had a lovely weekend in the mornings. Matthew was (KNOCK ON WOOD) back to his old self. He was friendly, fun, amiable, and even listened when we asked him to do stuff. We planted 90 million bulbs (and when I say "we" I mean Kevin & Matthew!) There are still a ton more to do mostly green plants that do not have flowers. We went to the local children's museum. We relaxed and enjoyed the outdoors a bit here and there. We went for walks. We had friends over for a little run around time with the kids. Overall it was nice besides you know the gut wrenching pain.
Currently Matthew's big thing is that he likes to help unload the groceries and tells us each item. It is fun and makes putting the groceries away a speedy process! I bought three cards at Kroger on Sunday so I could get a free little stuffed bunny rabbit - yes, I am total sucker but the bunny, it was really cute - and my goodness, you should have seen the look on Matthew's face when he pulled that out of the grocery bag. It made buying the cards WORTH IT! His eyes lit up and he turned to me and said with wonder "For me?" I about died from how sweet he was about getting that bunny! He hung on to that bunny all day yesterday and slept with it and told me he LOVED his new bunny "so much" both yesterday and this morning. He named the bunny Cary and introduced it to his other current favorite stuffed animal Bob the Beaver (whose voice comes from me and sounds like a grouchy old man... Matthew loves it!)
Happy St. Patty's Day to all!
OH and one more complaint then I will STOP, I swear. But lordy people the hot flashes and cold sweats... I told Kevin that if this is menopause I would prefer to skip that phase of life, please and thank you. Let's just say that both mornings this weekend I was in a short sleeved shirt OUTSIDE trying to cool off. Then once I cooled off I was HOT but freezing which is just a weird experience to have. SO yeah.
Other then the afternoon/evening illness - heat waves it was a great weekend. No seriously. I mean we had a lovely weekend in the mornings. Matthew was (KNOCK ON WOOD) back to his old self. He was friendly, fun, amiable, and even listened when we asked him to do stuff. We planted 90 million bulbs (and when I say "we" I mean Kevin & Matthew!) There are still a ton more to do mostly green plants that do not have flowers. We went to the local children's museum. We relaxed and enjoyed the outdoors a bit here and there. We went for walks. We had friends over for a little run around time with the kids. Overall it was nice besides you know the gut wrenching pain.
Currently Matthew's big thing is that he likes to help unload the groceries and tells us each item. It is fun and makes putting the groceries away a speedy process! I bought three cards at Kroger on Sunday so I could get a free little stuffed bunny rabbit - yes, I am total sucker but the bunny, it was really cute - and my goodness, you should have seen the look on Matthew's face when he pulled that out of the grocery bag. It made buying the cards WORTH IT! His eyes lit up and he turned to me and said with wonder "For me?" I about died from how sweet he was about getting that bunny! He hung on to that bunny all day yesterday and slept with it and told me he LOVED his new bunny "so much" both yesterday and this morning. He named the bunny Cary and introduced it to his other current favorite stuffed animal Bob the Beaver (whose voice comes from me and sounds like a grouchy old man... Matthew loves it!)
Happy St. Patty's Day to all!
Monday, December 10, 2007
News Worthy Exhaustion?!
There are various reasons I am tired. I am tired because we had our work holiday party in Indianapolis this weekend at the Conrad. It was a late night and I left my baby alone for the first time (which while I was not tearful this time, I felt a little bit like my right arm had fallen off...)
The Conrad is amazing and beautiful. The service - well mmmmahhhh - I could kiss all those kind people who said 'Hi' and 'Welcome' and 'Enjoy your stay' from the cleaners to the front desk & everyone in between. I also realized I am more of 4 star gal than a 5 star gal - the over abundance of snobbery and fur coats made me balk just a little.
However, I could learn to love the flat screen in the bathroom AND the turn down service in the evening! But most importantly, the spa services were amazing. I had a 90 minutes facial that included massages to my neck, legs and face. Can we say 'AHHHHHHHHH' together!? On the flip side my charming husband was "quite ill" from enjoying our holiday party a bit too much so I got to experience all of the Conrad and Circle Center on my own. Again on the flip side, I got to shop without worrying about how much he hates to shop.
It was LONG short weekend because upon returning home from the Conrad, Matthew was excited to see us as one would hope. We returned just as he was going down for a nap so of course he never napped. Both Kevin & I were pooped but managed to entertain Mr. Matthew sufficiently until he fell into bed (thankfully) earlier than normal. However, I had the headache from hell so mostly Kevin entertained which I alternately slept and felt like shit while I was awake. I woke up with the above mentioned headache but after a small dose of coffee the headache magically disappeared which reminded me (1) of my addiction and (2) of the fact that I never had any "real" coffee while at the hotel. Thus I made my own misery this past weekend...
I have been trying to think of a way to tactfully discuss the reasons I have been alternately tired and/or sick the past couple of weeks (so I just avoided writing about any of it...) In fact, I have been fighting with every fiber in my body to write about the subject I am sure you all will get sick of hearing about. I wanted to tell our family and friends before writing about it here.
I have proof this time! I remembered to grab the dang camera but sadly I mostly write at work and my photos are only uploaded to my computer at home but Kevin and I are expecting a baby come July 2008 (or so!!!!)
I will post the damning evidence when I am home one day soon but really all the evidence one needs is the fact that all of my pants (including the new size six ones I finally fit into the past two months...) no longer fit and I am alternately feeling sick and head achy or just plain tired (and sort of bitchy - more on that later...)
As for what I remember about the first pregnancy, holy crap, NOTHING. We were not planning to have any babies and than I was pregnant. SO I basically spent probably the first trimester and possibly some of the 2nd processing this interesting, exciting, thrilling new development! This time around I am ready to document every moment - oh yeah baby watch out!
The Conrad is amazing and beautiful. The service - well mmmmahhhh - I could kiss all those kind people who said 'Hi' and 'Welcome' and 'Enjoy your stay' from the cleaners to the front desk & everyone in between. I also realized I am more of 4 star gal than a 5 star gal - the over abundance of snobbery and fur coats made me balk just a little.
However, I could learn to love the flat screen in the bathroom AND the turn down service in the evening! But most importantly, the spa services were amazing. I had a 90 minutes facial that included massages to my neck, legs and face. Can we say 'AHHHHHHHHH' together!? On the flip side my charming husband was "quite ill" from enjoying our holiday party a bit too much so I got to experience all of the Conrad and Circle Center on my own. Again on the flip side, I got to shop without worrying about how much he hates to shop.
It was LONG short weekend because upon returning home from the Conrad, Matthew was excited to see us as one would hope. We returned just as he was going down for a nap so of course he never napped. Both Kevin & I were pooped but managed to entertain Mr. Matthew sufficiently until he fell into bed (thankfully) earlier than normal. However, I had the headache from hell so mostly Kevin entertained which I alternately slept and felt like shit while I was awake. I woke up with the above mentioned headache but after a small dose of coffee the headache magically disappeared which reminded me (1) of my addiction and (2) of the fact that I never had any "real" coffee while at the hotel. Thus I made my own misery this past weekend...
I have been trying to think of a way to tactfully discuss the reasons I have been alternately tired and/or sick the past couple of weeks (so I just avoided writing about any of it...) In fact, I have been fighting with every fiber in my body to write about the subject I am sure you all will get sick of hearing about. I wanted to tell our family and friends before writing about it here.
I have proof this time! I remembered to grab the dang camera but sadly I mostly write at work and my photos are only uploaded to my computer at home but Kevin and I are expecting a baby come July 2008 (or so!!!!)
I will post the damning evidence when I am home one day soon but really all the evidence one needs is the fact that all of my pants (including the new size six ones I finally fit into the past two months...) no longer fit and I am alternately feeling sick and head achy or just plain tired (and sort of bitchy - more on that later...)
As for what I remember about the first pregnancy, holy crap, NOTHING. We were not planning to have any babies and than I was pregnant. SO I basically spent probably the first trimester and possibly some of the 2nd processing this interesting, exciting, thrilling new development! This time around I am ready to document every moment - oh yeah baby watch out!
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