Up All Night

Not really but it sure felt like it. First, the Mole started last night but it came on at 10:00pm EDT... Woe is me. I was also working while it was on so I did not get to sleep until around 11:30pm. Sleep being a relative term of course. I laid there. I was uncomfortable, I tossed, I turned, IT WAS HOT despite the air conditioning & no covers. I could not turn the old brain off but I was not really thinking about anything per say, the brain was just a humming along. Lo, around 12:40pm I must have dozed off because I was dreaming that some child was crying in my dream and saying "I wannnt wannnt my my my Dadddddddddeee" before I sprang (hahahaha) from my bed to see what was the matter. That was no dream, it was M. Sobbing, sitting up, asking for his Daddy. I gave him the song and dance about everything being a-okay. I had to pee. I said I would be back which only sat well with him for a nano-second. I used the bathroom listening to him whimper and went back.

I laid down with him and hugged him. I told him everything was okay. I am not sure he believed me. Also, I do not think he was fully awake but he had that look on his face of being scared out of his wits. It has been a long time since I have been up with M in the middle of the night and having not really slept that made the whole experience more surreal (AKA sucky...) He fell back to sleep and I must have dozed off with my head leaning into my hand??? I already have issues with random body parts falling asleep you know when I am like standing or sitting fully awake so that was not fun to wake up to 20 minutes later. I got up and fell into bed only to hear M wailing again 5 minutes later. I woke K up this time and made him go in, M was calling for Daddy after all. Things were all quiet until I heard M literally chirping like the birds outside our window at 5:00 AM. UGH.

M has also taken to throwing himself dramatically at me when I leave for work from Kel's house, sobbing and asking for 'one more kiss & hug, mommmeee', 'where is my Daddy?', 'don't go Mommy'... Very dramatic like. Can we say regress much? This too shall pass, this too shall pass...

As an aside, I had my first dream (that I could remember) two nights ago that Baby Princess Pancake was born and she was crawling and sitting up in my arms gazing into my eyes and it made me melt. She was beautiful! Clearly she was not a newborn in my dream and I did not recall the specifics of the birth which I suppose it a good thing. With just that one dream, I can over look all of the woes of pregnancy just to see those beautiful sweet eyes looking up at me in the near future!